Monday, December 8, 2014

Steps backwards and tiny steps forward

12 weeks later
Well, people tell me I look great (ha ha), well in comparison.  The swelling continues to shrink a little bit.   The numbness still affects the left side of my mouth and nose.  I see itsy bitsy improvement so I have hope to be back to and feel normal again someday.  The bridge of my nose is still very tender - that is where the plate and screws are.
And my mouth still doesn't work properly.
My nose began to itch this week - I just love that healing itch.

Stepping back on Thanksgiving Day
Unfortunately I spent 7 hours today going to special Christmas sales.  By 9pm I was so miserable; my bad headache was back and my neck stiffness and pain which continued for days.

Saturday: Our Thanksgiving Day celebration
By the time everyone left at 9pm I was in so much pain.  I literally could not move the rest of the evening.  I have a horrible headache and neck pain.

December 3rd
I am confused quite often, and I can't remember a lot of things. I have trouble remembering things too.

13 long weeks later on December 5th
The bad headaches and neck pain have continued since Thanksgiving.  I have been battling depression.  The mouth repair that I was so excited for, was not totally a success.  Yes, it did help my mouth move more, but part of it has grown back in.  Probably because it is still numb there on my left upper left.  I am so disappointed, and I feel like I let my surgeon down.

The scar from my nose to my mouth is healing nicely.  My lower lip has more feeling.  So many times I just wish I could feel and look normal again, and so I have to remind myself of all the miracles I have been blessed with, to be grateful for the things on my body that do work correctly.  It's hard.  But I think I've finally accepted that when my doctor says "a year", that is what he means.  Now I can look forward to next September.




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